Very quickly you will come to the same conclusions as me that it can be difficult to entrust control of a man's sexuality to his spouse if she is not interested in the role of KH. Whether out of disdain for the practices often associated with BDSM, out of gene or lack of interest in exercise.
This third chapter aims to describe a version of the CMC which exists in the forums on male chastity, but which is not necessarily brought to the fore, often buried under the fantasies and desires of chastity difficult to apply to the everyday life, and whose benefits are not necessarily adapted to female pleasure, yet one of the foundations of the CMC.
It is therefore an attempt to lay the foundations for an accessible, fun CMC, applied with small challenges and completely dissociated from the influence of BDSM. The unpleasant fantasies in the ear of my spouse, she who did not choose to be KH, are thus discarded. The chastity cage is exploited until the couple jointly agrees to use it. And all the little hassles listed in the previous chapter are no longer really, because a certain flexibility is accepted,
I emphasize that there is therefore not a single CMC, but a multitude of levels of application of the CMC. You can choose the one that suits you. You are free to go for a more classic CMC if it works in your couple.
Here are some variations of the CMC that I try to name as best I can:
CMT Total Male Chastity (24/7/365)
CMC BDSM (discipline, humiliation, domination)
CMC SM (genital mutilation, pain)
CMC DS (slave-mistress relationship, femdom, fetish)
CMC Eroticized (erotization of the cage)
Gynarchic CMC (24/7, ideological, matriarchy)
Virtual CMC (24/7, virtual KH, self-bondage)
Non-SM CMC (24/7, Domination-Submission)
CMC by Sylvia Labiche (24/7/365, sexuality control, gynarchic)
Moderate non-SM CMC (0-3 weeks, DS allowed but moderately)
Reasoned CMC (0-3 weeks, penetration control, emotional chastity, non-DS)
CMO Male Chastity by Goals (self-checking for a pre-determined duration)
The idea of this guide is therefore to promote ultra-moderate male chastity, free from the practices of BDSM, which I call the reasoned CMC.
The reasoned CMC sticks to the very simple principle that the chastity cage first has a fundamental function of controlling the sexuality of the couple by the woman, more precisely penetration.
The caged mourns the penetration [1]. In fact, the man caged by reasoned male chastity is not really upset to mourn.
This control is applied in a moderate, simple, part-time way, with little challenges, at the most profitable moment for the couple and completely dissociated from the grip of BDSM.
The reasoned CMC sticks to the very simple principle that the chastity cage first has a fundamental function of controlling the sexuality of the couple by the woman, more precisely penetration.
Also, the caged man also makes the effort not to eroticize the game and seeks the benefits of both emotional chastity (sexual thoughts at rest) and physical chastity (control of his sexuality by the KH) .
We know that the man becomes gentle and caressing during periods of chastity. It also takes an effort to remain pleasant for the spouse and avoid going towards the fantasy and practices related to BDSM. The woman learns to be selfish about her own pleasure and expresses how she wants the couple's sexuality to be. She refuses penetration and the caged man manages this mourning of penetration. Through this mourning that he will experience in several stages, he will come to discover a new male sexuality less phallocentrist, more intimate, more sensual, softer and more respectful.
The following table attempts to shed some light on the distinction between the grading scale between different CMCs. The definition may not be perfect, but it clearly distinguishes reasoned CMC from other CMCs.
Notice that there are two levels of involvement in the role of KH. KH active which means of the spouse holds the key and assumes the management and control of the sexuality of the spouse. This is the basis of the CMC: the control of male sexuality.
The other level is the dominant KH where in addition to managing the key, the KH takes on a more dominant role over her spouse. Beyond the control, the KH will want to take a place of choice in the relationship of the couple. This level of domination is very variable and goes in extreme cases to play at the master-slave relationship (Femdom). This position of the dominant KH does not exist in the reasoned CMC which is dissociated from BDSM. In other words, the reasoned KH remains an accomplice and does not have to play the role of dominatrix.
The reasoned CMC rather seeks a fair balance in the couple, equality, fairness, and respect. It is exempt from any form of domination-submission other than what management of the key allows. This is reflected in the couple's sexuality and in the sharing of daily tasks.
The reasoned CMC rather seeks a fair balance in the couple, equality, fairness, and respect. It is exempt from any form of domination-submission other than what management of the key allows.
And the reasoned theme does not mean reasonable. You can abuse the reasoned CMC, or not! Reasoned means that KH and encagé have thought about why and how they want to integrate the CMC into their relationship. They have made realistic choices, made compromises, established guidelines and are each benefiting from them. It is a pragmatic and respectful male chastity, which resembles the values of the couple.
Caging with small challenges will make him cajoler, in love and he will learn to enjoy caresses. He mourns the penetration.
The reasoned CMC is therefore applied on a part-time basis, at the most profitable time for the couple. We are talking about small challenges, therefore short or prolonged periods of chastity during which the spouse, in her full role as KH, manages the sexuality of her caged spouse. Apart from these periods of chastity, married life follows its normal course.
Punctual
Duration of a few hours.
Priority to female pleasure while prohibiting penetration.
Physical chastity.
Short
Challenges calculated in hours (8h, 12h, 18h, 24h, 48h, 72h, 96 hours)
Priority to female pleasure while prohibiting penetration.
Physical chastity.
Emotional chastity.
Extended
Duration from five days to fifteen days.
Priority to female pleasure while prohibiting penetration.
Physical chastity.
Emotional chastity.
Benefits of DPO Rates
Long duration
Indefinite durations (24/7) of more than two weeks.
Closer to classic CMC, may present an occasional challenge in reasoned CMC.
Preparatory
Voluntary abstinence or partial control of male orgasm before a prolonged period to obtain interesting DPO levels.
Can be done without the cage or partially with the cage.
Extension
Addition by the KH of an extension to a period of chastity.
Normally for 6, 12 or 24 additional hours.
Not planned applied according to the desire and the context.
With the reasoned CMC, interest in pornography, performance and BDSM stuff loses a lot of meaning. The man turns his gaze, in love, towards his spouse. His view of women changes and he commits to the greatest respect for them.
The most daring couples will explore new male pleasures which I will discuss in the next chapter. It will explore how male pleasure can be obtained in a very satisfying way by holding the cage in place or by playing with it.
Man will therefore have the right to pleasure, but in a much less phallocentrist, less heteronormative way. His sexuality is then different from that of the erection-penetration-ejaculation conveyed by current society in the image of the standard male. It is the discovery of a whole new horizon on masculinity, without complex.
Reasoned CMC is therefore easy to apply. Funny, it doesn't have to be taken too seriously.
Notes:
[1] Interesting reading: “Beyond Penetration, Martin Page”
[2] Masculine pleasure, although less phallocentristic, is permitted. The man caged by the reasoned CMC learns to obtain pleasure other than by penetration.